I feel like an irritable but loving parent to Miley Cyrus. I guess we all are, to an extent. The child has grown up in front of us, and is now acting out every, single cliched rebellion she can think of. Nothing new, everything hackneyed and predictable. No one is setting boundaries or providing valuable guidance, at least no one that she respects. And so this ridiculous behaviour carries on, until she wants to grow up. I saw a picture of Taylor Momsen this week — you remember Little Jen from Gossip Girl? She was all sweet-faced and cool, no trace of the racoon eye makeup and torn fishnets of a couple of years ago. So, really, we just need to give it time.

In the meanwhile, we have Miley swanning about town in an avant garde pair of trousers, designed by Jean Paul Gaultier, with one leg skinny and completely sheer — yes we can see you are not wearing any knickers, how terribly naughty — and the other leg a straight tuxedo style. I'm not sure this is a massively flattering look for her or anyone else. But, hey, she gets to show skin, nakedness, wear it with just a bra and whatever else she thinks is going to convince us that she is very, very bad. When in fact she is a smart, funny, talented little thing of whom I am terribly fond. All I can say is I am glad we can't se her tongue and I do hope she moves through this phase soon because I really hate an odd-legged pant.